Controlling Negative Thoughts (Part Two)
Dismantling the web...
Before we dive in, I have a gift for you at the end of this note. If you make it to the end, I’ll be waiting to hear from you. Enjoy!
Have you considered how a tree grows? First, you plant a seed and with some nurturing, it grows into a seedling and then into a big plant and subsequently a tree is correct before you.
Negative thoughts do not remain that way. They grow into negative self-talk. In time you begin to talk to see yourself, others and the World that way and the implication of this is that it extends into the way you talk to yourself daily. It can even be subtle that you don’t realise that it becomes the lens through which you see the world.
Therefore, you want to dismantle the web and get out of it.
Once recognized, the majority of illogical cognitive habits are reversible. This also holds true for negative thinking. So the first step will be identifying your negative thoughts and writings them down
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What Can you Do to Stop Cognitive Distortions and Negative Thinking?
Identify You Most used Distorted Thought or Thinking about your thoughts
If you can, take a break and step away from the upsetting occurrence and attempt to concentrate on the stories you're telling yourself about it. This is known as metacognition (thinking about what you’re thinking).
You can write down the most prominent thoughts you have throughout the day. Try to link the thought to a place or situation. E.g. when and where did you have the negative thought for the first time? Once you have the thought and the situation, identify the emotion it causes you.
Replacing absolutes
When you pay attention to your thoughts and spot a pattern, you might want to think about substituting words like "always" and "nothing" with "sometimes" and "this." These are indicators of absolutes.
Defining yourself and others
Try giving the behaviour a name. Consider saying, "I just didn't clean today," rather than calling yourself "lazy" because you didn't clean today. You need not conclude on yourself by just a single event. These labels don’t apply to the person as a whole.
Searching for positive aspects
It could be difficult at first, but try to look for at least three good things in any circumstance. Even though it may not feel natural at first, it could gradually turn into a habit.
Does evidence back up your negative thought?
Consider inquiring, looking into, and interrogating people and yourself before coming to a conclusion to make sure you have as many facts as you can. Make a special effort, if you can, to accept these facts as accurate, rather than just believe anything.
Avoid the Urge to Generalise
Overgeneralization and black-or-white thinking are two cognitive distortions that might cause you to generalize one bad experience to everyone and everything. Saying something that is inaccurate, for instance, does not imply that everything you say is inaccurate. Any scenario can be reframed in your mind if you can learn to recognize the differences. The "opposite threes" method might be beneficial.
Opposite Threes
Consider three alternatives to the circumstance whenever you catch yourself making a generalization. Consider moving your focus to three instances where you have been correct, effective, or successful when you feel like you never accomplish anything right, for instance.
When reevaluating negative thoughts, many people find that working with a mental health professional is beneficial. It can be a good idea to seek the support of a professional who can walk you through the process if you believe that your distorted beliefs are affecting your relationships or how you view yourself.
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Now, just as promised. I have a free ebook for you titled: Self Talk: How to Train Your Brain to Turn Negative Thinking into Positive Thinking & Practice Self Love by Aston Sanders.
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To get it, send an email requesting the book to psychphidims@gmail.com, and you will receive it in no time!
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